If someone gives you a knife, thank them.
If you've never used a real knife before, take it slow. You're probably not the same caliber as an "Iron Chef".
Even if you're an "Iron Chef" learn your knife before you decide to play Speed Racer.
Keep the band-aids in the kitchen.
Lay down with your finger above your head until the dizziness passes if you're too stupid not to take it slow until you become familiar with your knife.
If one of your friends and family find the piece of fingernail that you cut off along with the tip of your finger, tell them that they won the prize, and hand them a $50.00 bill.
Make sure that you ask for a Global knife. I've never been able to dice, chop, or slice like I've been able to do with my new 10" Chef's knife. Global is great.
Time to change the band-aid. Blood is starting to seep through.
Peace!
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